the almost that never ended
Unique Whispers
“Sexual assault and domestic violence are difficult things to talk about. Talk about them anyway.”—Mariska Hargitay
TW: Refers to SA
In all honesty, I endured a situation that changed me.
I experienced the feeling of being trapped.
I thought I had felt it before, knew it’s touch, or even could picture how it would’ve felt if left in my bones—but the truth was I hadn’t ever felt it before. The isolation where no help was near and I couldn’t escape. Being saved was a blur to me, because the feeling of fear had rattled so deep inside me I could only see myself as a cornered animal.
Reliving it afterwards was the worst part, the feeling that crept up my spine endlessly. I didn’t sleep for several days because every time I closed my eyes, I was back there reliving it—imagining what would’ve happened if no one had gotten there in time.
What people don’t think about in the “almost” situations is the fact that the person didn’t know the outcome.
The fear was real in that moment and it altered the way our brain processed information. I could no longer trust people, walk alone at night, or even stop my hands from shaking when I saw the person again. We’d lock eyes and I’d lose focus on what I was doing or where I was going. I could only wait till his presence left the room and his glare stopped burning into the back of my head.
I was now stuck between wanting to change the past and ensuring my safety in the future.
I feel differences in the ways I think, the way I walk, and the way I see people. It’s all becoming this burden on me to fix, to heal, and to take care of. I’d given the benefit of the doubt, tried to think through what to do, and it all led to the truth of the matter:
Some people don’t want to do right by you, and hoping they will, won’t change that.
Could someone just peel back this fear inside my chest and take it from me?
Would I always find myself back in that moment with no way to get out? My heart racing, my mind frozen, my heart breaking?
Was I the only one who saw them for who they were? This side of them they never show to others? The dark parts of their dirty mind that got the best of them?
I see right through them and they hate it.
They hoped I’d bend to their words that dripped with sweetener and their rehearsed lines they cherry-picked from the pulpit—but I didn’t. I saw the uncontrolled emotion in their heart, the darkness that tugged in their veins, and the lust that they couldn’t tame.
As long as everyone around them couldn’t see them, they weren’t exposed.
But it was me who saw through the smudged glass clearly and it made them twitch. They looked over their shoulder and their insides burned with secret shame for who they were.
Every lie that was spread was only an attempt to claw themselves out from under the consequences. They flipped the script, poisoned people’s thoughts, and fed off the weakened hearts of those around them. A part of them lingered in the air I breathed, and what was meant to last only a moment, still hadn’t ended.
If only people could have seen it, felt it, heard it—maybe they could understand… or maybe they never wanted to in the first place. Either way, I still walked away changed, and they remained the same.
I saw the truth, and that has to mean something—
even if it only means something to me.
Copyright Ⓒ 2026 Anna Limcher. All rights reserved.
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I also have another page called Modern Psycho! I think it’s important to share information, opportunities to learn, and new perspectives for reflection. This blog also provides a theological perspective—one that combines science and spiritual understanding of the mind.
oh please be brave ❤️❤️u are a brave woman.
So glad to see you after a long time, beautiful work Anya